Allyson Felix Doesn’t Sugarcoat It

Allyson Felix is just like any other mom. That probably sounds laughable — not many mothers can say they’ve won 11 medals as an Olympic athlete. But when the retired track and field star talks about her life raising 6-year-old Camryn and 1-year-old Trey with husband Kenneth Ferguson, it’s hard not to feel like we’re living parallel lives. Like so many other women, Felix worried about how starting a family would affect her career. She rushes back from meetings to make it in time to see her baseball-loving daughter’s double-header. She frets on work trips that she may miss her son’s first steps back home. And she knows how rare it is to have a moment to yourself. “Sometimes it’s just sitting in the car before I go into the house to take a minute,” she says, laughing.

She didn’t know it at the time, but Camryn’s birth kicked off the second act of Felix’s career: advocating for women, especially mothers and women of color, in sports and beyond. After an emergency cesarean section in 2018, she spoke before Congress about the dire state of Black maternal health in America. In 2019, she was one of a handful of athletes who spoke up about Nike’s lack of salary protections for the pregnant women and mothers it sponsors and later parted ways with the company. (Following the outcry, Nike changed its policies.) And last summer, just a few months after giving birth to Trey through a VBAC (as she announced in a moving Instagram post), Felix attended the 2024 Olympic Games in Paris to launch the first-ever nursery at the Olympic Village.

Camryn came with her. “I was really trying to play up these moms who were competing: ‘Look at that! Isn’t that so cool? She’s a mom!’” recalls Felix, who is the subject of a new documentary, She Runs the World. “My daughter was so unfazed by it. She was like, ‘Oh, yeah, but moms can win gold medals.’ That wasn’t a thing for her. Seeing that her mind is working in this different way gives me hope that the culture is shifting.”

But the 39-year-old knows there’s more work to be done. Today, Felix is the co-founder of women’s footwear brand Saysh alongside her brother and business partner, Wes Felix, as well as Always Alpha, a sports management agency that she launched with Wes and veteran sports executive Cosette Chaput. Always Alpha focuses exclusively on women athletes, drawing on Felix’s own experiences to help secure better deals and representation for women in an industry — and society — that makes being both a competitive professional and a hands-on parent feel impossible. For Felix, who will be inducted into the 2025 class of the U.S. Olympic & Paralympic Hall of Fame this summer, it’s a way to bring her passions together under one roof.

We spoke by Zoom about the challenges she faces as an entrepreneur, the joy of watching her kids’ sibling relationship, and the big surprises of retirement.

You’re officially one year postpartum! How are you doing?

I’m doing better. I started off the first two months super rocky. Two kids really shook up my world, and recovery was way more than I thought it was going to be. When I get to move my body, it makes me feel like more of myself. [But with] the second kid, you are just keeping up. I’ve very much felt the busyness of it and putting myself last. I’ve been trying to be intentional about carving out time for myself, and that has really made a difference.

What does that look like for you now? Especially this transition from the regimented life of an Olympic athlete to the chaos of parenthood.

Yeah, I think that was why it was so difficult with the second child — I was dealing with a lot around identity. I’ve always been an athlete. Who am I away from that? What does my life look like apart from those things? I am not a morning person, but I’ve had to go there because if I don’t, it’s not going to happen. So I have to do the 5 a.m. wake-up. I have to do the 6 a.m. workout. Once the kids go down, I’ll do another workout. That’s what it looks like. But I started taking tennis lessons, so that’s a treat for me.

When you’re a working mom, you don’t want to miss time with your kids. But sometimes you can’t help it. How do you handle running two companies and the travel that comes with that while trying to show up for those special moments?

The first thing is I have an incredible partner — without him, I could not do any of the things that I do. That always makes me feel great to know that my kids are with their dad. But the reality is that I just have horrible mom guilt. I try to talk to my daughter about work and things that I’m passionate about so she understands. But at the end of the day, sometimes it’s just hard not to be there for those important moments.

My son’s going to walk any day now. It’s just a matter of time. I’m glad that I made it through my work week and he hasn’t done it yet, so I feel like I’m maybe going to catch it. But I just do the best that I can. The balance is unattainable. It’s understanding that some days I’m going to show up at work and it’s going to be great, and I’ll come home and it’ll be chaos. Other days it’ll go the other way. There’s no secret.

When did you feel the call toward advocacy? What inspired you to take that work on?

It was just what I went through [as an athlete] and how awful it made me feel. Feeling like someone else was putting me in a box and telling me, “This is who you are.” It’s the message that was sent to me. No one ever sat me down and was like, “You can’t have kids until you do this.” But it’s what I saw, particularly in my sport. There were mothers, but they were never celebrated. Contracts were being cut; contracts were being paused. They were being pushed out of the sport because financially, they just couldn’t do it any longer.

I always felt like “Well, if I do enough, then that won’t be me.” And when I got to that place — I had gone to four Olympic Games; I had six gold medals — I was like, “I’m safe.” And then when I found myself in the same situation, it felt like there was no winning, like I had no control of this thing. That’s where a lot of the fight came from.

“Motherhood is a messy, chaotic situation. Yes, it’s the best. I would never trade it for anything, but it’s one of the most challenging things I’ve ever faced.”

I love that you use that word: safe. Especially as Black women, you’re like: “I checked off all the boxes. I did all the things you told me I’m supposed to do. I exceeded expectations. I should be safe.” And this idea that you never get to that level — it’s heartbreaking.

It’s so defeating and draining. When I wrote The New York Times op-ed [about my Nike experience], that was an eye-opening experience for me. It always felt like you were in this alone because no one was really talking about it. And then the response from other women across industries — it was just like, “Oh, my goodness, we’re all going through this.”

What was it like deciding to write it? I imagine you must have agonized over it.

I went back and forth for a long time over it because it was so outside of my comfort zone. I am a people pleaser, so I was really scared. It only happened, I really believe, because I had a traumatic birth experience [with my daughter]. She was in the NICU for a month, and I was literally watching her fight. The last straw was when Nike reached out and asked me to be a part of this Women’s World Cup campaign and to use my image. At the same time, internally, we are battling over maternal protections. Like, what?

I will never forget being in my daughter’s nursery. We’re newly out of the NICU. It was just a deep calling: I have to do this. If I don’t, this is just a never-ending cycle.

Was there also some anger there? You’re dealing with this major life shift, and then on the professional side of things, you’re having to almost justify your worth. That had to make you angry.

Oh, absolutely. The audacity of a group of men to tell me how I should come back from giving birth in a traumatic way? It really, for the first time, put into perspective where sport really fell in my life. It had dominated everything for so long. I was that athlete going above and beyond for the company because they preached how “we’re a family” and all that. I really fell into that. And so to be dealing with a life-and-death situation, and then being told if I didn’t come back and make a world championship team eight months after this whole experience of giving birth, I would get a further reduction? Even after the 70% less than I was going to be given? It was just like “How much can one person take?” There was definitely anger for sure.

There’s been a lot of talk about the current wellbeing of mothers. The former U.S. Surgeon General said parental stress was a major public-health issue last year. The singer Chappell Roan more recently declared that none of her mom friends are happy, which garnered a lot of backlash. How do you think about motherhood and happiness?

This myth that every day is going to be like you’re smelling roses or whatever — it’s just not. Motherhood is a messy, chaotic situation. Yes, it’s the best. I would never trade it for anything, but it’s one of the most challenging things I’ve ever faced. The reality is so hard, but we’re not talking about that in the mainstream. That’s not the message people are getting. If you’re a mom, you know. If you are a partner, you get it. But I think that sometimes people aren’t ready for the true rawness of how hard it is. I look at my life and the support I have, and it’s still hard. So I think about those who are single mothers, who don’t have the village, who don’t have the grandparents that are nearby, and I wonder how they do it. Because without the support, some days I don’t think I would be able to make it.

There were also recent reports that the current administration is exploring ways to incentivize women to have children, such as a “baby bonus” of $5,000. So much of your work goes beyond providing financial assistance to women and focuses on creating actual structures to support them. Can you talk about why that’s so important? In the U.S. we don’t have federal paid leave policies and childcare is exorbitantly expensive — those things play a major role in why motherhood is so hard.

I couldn’t agree more. When you look at other countries that do have that extended parental leave, you’re looking at maybe happier people because you’re able to fully heal. You’re able to bond as a family. All of these things that we’re disrupting and not giving a chance to fully bake, they have consequences. Your mental health will just deteriorate if you can’t get a break. That is a lot of people’s reality.

Going through the experience of motherhood is understanding that there’s so much beyond the financial implications. A lot of my work has been around being able to have the choice: of motherhood, of going after your profession, or doing both at the same time. Knowing what it feels like when that’s cut off, it’s just awful. So many people have come before us to pave the way, and we have to continue to do that work for our daughters and sons as well, to understand that [that choice] is something we should always have. Right now, we’re going backwards. We're rolling back rights. It’s heartbreaking to see.

“The balance is unattainable. It’s understanding that some days I’m going to show up at work and it’s going to be great, and I’ll come home and it’ll be chaos. Other days it’ll go the other way.”

I want to ask you about launching Saysh, which is four years old now. What’s it been like growing a new brand these past few years?

It’s been really challenging trying to break through among the footwear giants in an industry that’s a legacy industry. And as a woman of color, raising capital has been a completely defeating experience. Constantly going into rooms full of older white men and pitching and the amount of nos — it’s been really challenging. But then I’ll see somebody wearing our shoes and they’ll tell me this incredible story, and I’m like, “Yes! Continue forward!”

Raising capital is a really important part of being an entrepreneur that I don’t think a lot of people appreciate, especially those who assume you already have a level of privilege as a former professional athlete.

The access is there. You get the meetings. But when you get in the meetings, a lot of times people have already put you into a box and think they know [the answer]. Sometimes it’s more of a meet-and-greet than a serious meeting. Or we’d be breaking down the idea of shoes not being made for women to a group of men, and they’d be like, “Can you send the shoes for my 11-year-old daughter? We’re going to let her make the decision on this.” Like, there’s not a woman on your team?

At every turn, there’s kind of been a fight. I think that’s just reality for women. We get like 2% of venture funds. And then when you look at women of color, it’s a fraction of that. There always seems to be a reason why you aren’t quite the right fit for whatever fund it is. But what has been helpful coming from the athletic world is persistence. Not giving up. I have that on my side.

I feel like your sports management company, Always Alpha, sits at the intersection of a lot of your advocacy interests. What led you to start it?

A lot of athletes would come to me and ask for suggestions of agents where they should go. I didn’t feel great about sending them in any particular direction. My brother represented me for a good portion of my career, and he created this kind of boutique experience. He brought in experts from different areas. He really listened to what I wanted to do in sport, outside of sport. I feel like at a lot of the large agencies — I have nothing against them, I’ve been represented by some of them — take this one-size-fits-all approach: “These are your options of brands.”

I just think for women, we shouldn't be marketed in the same way as a man. What we do at Always Alpha is tailor the experience to the individual female athlete that we’re dealing with. And we’re bringing brands that haven’t necessarily been in the sports space and introducing them as well. For me, it’s really about giving back. There are so many things I learned throughout my career where I was like “I wish I would’ve known that earlier.” And now I’m able to pass that on.

What were some of those things?

I was 17 years old when my first contract was done. My representation handled everything. But I would encourage athletes now to sit at the table. Learn what they’re talking about. Understand thoroughly what’s in your contract, and be involved in the process. Athletes now have the ability to really take control of their careers in such a different way, to build their own brands and create their own content. I think you have to be deeply involved in all of your businesses. It would’ve just made for an easier road.

“A lot of my work has been around being able to have the choice: of motherhood, of going after your profession, or doing both at the same time.”

It’s awesome that you have such a close personal and professional relationship with your sibling.

I always tell people you know right away if you can work with a sibling. He's always been a great big brother. He’s two and a half years older than me, and I’ve always looked up to him. I was probably that annoying little sister who just tagged along and wanted to do everything that he did. That’s even why I started running — because he was. Because we’re running multiple businesses and things are so busy now, we don’t have as much time together as we used to. But yesterday, we both flew in for an event and got done a little early and got to go to lunch just as brother and sister. I was like, “This is the best part of my day! I get to have lunch with my brother!”

I love that. When my oldest was about 18 months, I thought “OK, I’m ready for another child.” But then it was weird. I was like, “We could do this, or she could be an only child.”

Oh, my gosh, same experience.

But I feel like siblings are so important. I’m one of four, and I’m very close with all of my siblings, especially my older sister. And so when we got pregnant with my youngest and found out it was a girl, I couldn’t help but think about that special relationship that I have with my big sister. What is it like for you seeing the bond between your kids take shape?

That’s really why I always wanted to have two kids — our relationship is so special. For a long time, I really wanted the same age gap that me and my brother had because I feel like we get to do life together. That didn’t happen, and that made me sad for a really long time. My son was an IVF pregnancy, so that was a whole journey in itself. But I can already see how much love my daughter has for him. She wants to feed him a bottle. When he wakes up, she’s running in there. She thinks she’s a little mother or something. It’s very cute. I’m like, “OK, no matter the age gap, there’s still that relationship.”

We’ve been talking a lot about identity shifts — from being a full-time athlete to being a mom. So the last question I’ll leave you with is the one you brought up earlier: Who is Allyson Felix away from all that?

I really am a person who enjoys all my different roles. I’m passionate about so many different things, and I’m also still learning. I don’t think I have it all figured out yet. I’m in therapy. I’m doing all the things and processing and working through. It’s the first time in my life that I’ve had to answer that question. I’ve had to deeply explore who I am, and I think I’m not there yet. I’m still in the state of becoming.

This interview has been lightly edited and condensed for clarity.