Baby You Can Drive My Car

An 8-Year-Old Girl Borrowed The Family Car To Go To Target

After the child’s parents reported her missing, police located her almost half an hour away, safely in the Target parking lot.

by Jamie Kenney
Young cheerful girl in her Girl Guide’s uniform, laughing joyfully while sitting in the passenger se...
Images By Tang Ming Tung/DigitalVision/Getty Images

Whomst among us has not, at some point, submitted to the siren song of Target? The Dollar Spot, the cute clothes, the home decor, the in-store Starbucks where we reward ourselves with a little treat: it’s all calling to us. And apparently, for some, the urge to make a Target run starts early and rages strong. Take, for example, the 8-year-old in Ohio who recently drove herself to wander the aisles of our favorite retail therapy location.

Cleveland NBC affiliate WKYC shared the news that a girl from Bedford, Ohio was reported missing, along with the family’s car at 7 a.m. on Sunday, September 15. A neighbor shared footage from their security camera that showed the child entering the car by herself and driving off. From there, Bedford Police had to follow more clues to determine where, exactly, the child was headed. Fortunately, a citizen had reported spotting a child driving a car that matched the description of the family’s Nissan Rogue and police had traffic camera footage of the vehicle. Ultimately, they found the car in the Target parking lot, almost half an hour from the child’s home.

We are equally horrified and impressed and have so many questions. What possessed this kid to grab the keys and slink out of the house? What did she need at Target? Did she have any money with her or did she just want to browse? Where did she learn to drive? How did her feet even reach the pedals? Did she know the way by memory or did she use GPS? And we know that prefrontal cortex is basically soup at this age (no shade to the kiddo: that’s developmentally appropriate), but what exactly did she think was going to happen?

According to WKYC, police report that while the girl hit a mailbox on her drive and dinged up the car, no one has been reported injured. So... all’s well that ends well, we guess, but our heart is still racing at all the “What If”s.

Now, if you’ll excuse me: I’m going to go hide my car keys somewhere because at this point I have no idea what my 10-year-old Target-loving kiddo might be capable of...