17 Moms Share The Subtle (& Not-So-Subtle) Ways They Let Their Partners Know They’re DTF
Life gets busy, so when the mood strikes, you gotta be ready.
Sex once you’re a parent looks a little different. There’s less time, you’re more prone to end-of-the-night exhaustion, and who can remember the last time you showered? But just because your sex life looks different doesn’t mean it’s any less attainable — you just have to adapt. And sometimes that means giving your partner a heads up and letting them know, “Hey. I’m horny. Please help.” From sending a dirty text to getting a little flirtatious with a back rub, tons of moms in the trenches just like you have ways of letting their partner know they’re in the mood... and honestly, you’re going to want to steal a few of these ideas.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with simply pulling your partner aside and saying, “Hey. Tonight. Sex.” But if you want to keep some of that mystique from when you first started dating or make it a little extra sexy and flirtatious, dropping some hints can be really fun. It’s a way to get your partner excited, too — I don’t know if everyone likes being told, “Hey, we’re having sex tonight, get ready” — and have them in the same mood as you. It sets some anticipation, and before you know it, you’ll be ready to tear each other’s clothes off the minute you’re alone.
So, whether you need some inspiration or camaraderie from other moms trying to squeeze sex into their busy lives, here are 16 subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways real moms let their partners know they’re in the mood.
Wearing something sexy.
“I have a few nighties that I will put on for movie night or when we’re just watching TV after the kids go to bed, and it is definitely my signal for, ‘Hey, I really want the chill part of Netflix and chill if you know what I mean.’ These are like my sexy nightgowns. Boobs up where they belong, tight in all the right places, lots of leg showing — he loves it.” — Samantha S., mom of 3
“Putting on an outfit that I know gets him goin’ when clearly we’re not going anywhere.” — Katie M., mom of one
“I don’t mind just telling my guy when I want to have sex, but I do love wearing this one pair of underwear and flashing him at some point during the day so he knows what’s up.” — Sarah H., mom of one
Send a sext... or a sexy pic.
“Always a hot text. Sometimes I’ll send a nude, but most of the time I just text something like, ‘We need alone time tonight.’” — Julie H., mom of two
“I like sending some dirty texts throughout the day. Builds up anticipation.” — Jennifer P., mom of three
“I send him a sexy photo, but it’s like really subtle. Like maybe just the lace from my bra or like my dress hiked up a little bit.” — Joy T., mom of one
“I guess it’s not very subtle to send a text that’s like, ‘Can we please have sex tonight?’ but that’s my go-to.” — Molly K., mom of two
Get a little more physical with affection.
“When my husband leaves for work and I know I want to fool around that night, I’ll give him a really good, long kiss and we sort of make out for a bit before he’s out the door. And then I know he’s just thinking about it all day.” — Lauren G., mom of two
“If I ask my boyfriend to give me a back rub, he knows it means I want him to rub me for a bit and then escalate the touching to sex. Sometimes I’ll offer to give him a neck rub, and he’ll say, ‘Like a real one or a sex one?’” — Joanne Y., mom of one
“An intense smooch with a butt grab.” — Katie M., mom of one
“We try to be really good about kissing each other at least once a day, but if I make the kiss last a little longer, I think he has an idea.” — Grace W., mom of two
“Lots of touching and rubbing on the couch. Holding hands. Running my hand through his hair.” — Alexa F., mom of two
Change up the routine.
“My husband and I always go to bed at different times — he’s more of a night owl, and I prefer waking up early. But if I want to get busy, I’ll ask him, ‘Hey, do you want to come to bed with me tonight?’ and he knows it’s not just for sleeping.” — Samantha S., mom of three
“I always shower in the morning before work, but sometimes I like to take a fresh shower before having sex. So if my husband hears the shower running at night, he usually just heads into our bedroom to wait for me.” — Kelsey R., mom of two
“Honestly, if I’m being extra chatty and not just scrolling my phone at the end of the night, he knows I’m horny.” — Callie L., mom of two
“Most nights we just put the kids to bed and fall on the couch, but when I’m in the mood, I’ll wait for him at the bottom of the stairs, and once the kids are asleep, we go in our room.” — Haley T., mom of three
“I shave my legs. And then I say, ‘OMG, look how smooth my legs are! I just shaved them!’ and my wife absolutely knows what’s up.” — Tara F., mom of one
No matter what, your partner’s going to be thrilled to hear you’re in the mood — even if they need a sexy pic from you to get them to your level.
