This Mom Is Choosing A Relaxing "NO-vember" Where The Entire Family Stays Home
Does your family need to clear the calendar for a month?
I just looked at my family’s calendar for this week, and it’s completely overwhelming. We have an evening social event scheduled every single night for a week — and it only gets worse from there as we creep closer to Thanksgiving and Christmas. The holidays have barely started and I’m already wondering when I’ll be able to get a moment of rest.
I’m not alone. A lot of families are feeling the stress this month — and one mom has put her foot down. Hilary, known as @momlooksandgoodbooks on Instagram, shared her plan for holiday survival, and it involves saying “no” to all social events in November. And yes, she calls it No-vember.
Hilary explained what No-vember is in a series of slides, answering FAQs and sharing exactly how this month of no obligations works.
The general idea is that for the entire month of November, the family turns down every invitation if it falls outside of their family unit.
“My family (and I) felt overwhelmed by the level of over-committing that was happening due to extracurriculars, play dates, adult plans, etc.,” she explains in one caption. “For our family, November is the perfect month because soccer season ends, and then we have a month to re-group before the holidays begin.”
She goes on to explain that it really does mean saying “no” to everything that involves “giving energy” to anything outside of their private sphere.
The result? The whole family gets to recharge for 30 days.
“Our children (and us!) have time to relax,” she writes. “99% of our family arguments happen when we’re in a rush to get somewhere. We spend our evenings just being together, finding activities to do together, and being intentional with quality time.”
On their third year of No-vember now, Hilary shares that there’s almost no FOMO to speak of, though at first it stings a little. Her spouse and kids love it, and they’ve never gotten pushback from friends. In fact, some of their friends have joined the trend.
There are two little exceptions: Thanksgiving is social, of course, and Hilary takes one night of the month to run her book club meeting.
While there have been other “No-vember” trends in the past that have to do with drawing boundaries or taking breaks, this is the first one we’ve seen that specifically relates to saying no to social events as a family unit. And we have to say: it sounds pretty good — even if you try it for a shorter amount of time, like a little weekend.
